Karangan lucu

0l0 = zakar :-)

如果怕作文字不够，就用这招

为何房屋高涨？

兔子月薪5千，打算用20万建一个窝。


狼不允许，说私自建就是违章建筑，只允许向王八买。


王八是搞房地产的，先用20万贿赂狼取得开发权，再用50万元向狼买这块地，投资10万元把兔子盖好，向兔子要价200万元。
... 
兔子拿不出这么多钱于是向狐狸借200万元，连本带利300万，20年还清，兔子全家二十年给狐狸打工。


狼、狐狸、王八都挣了钱，只有兔子亏，连孩子也不敢生了。


兔子越来越少，狼觉得这样下去大家没肉吃，于是调控。


狼显得非常重视兔窝价格太贵的问题，研究部署了遏制兔窝价格过快上涨的政策措施。最后认定兔窝价格卖得太高的原因是因为有的兔子买了兔窝后自己不住而进行倒卖所致。


于是狼规定：兔子买了兔窝5年内卖了的，要向狼交纳营业税。


结果兔窝价格没降下来，狼却发了大财。


狼又对狐狸说：只借钱给首先交了更多钱的兔子，并提高高利贷的利息，多买兔子窝的不借，全交现钱。这样狐狸在兔子的购窝过程中也发了财。


王八借着兔窝价格上涨的行情，以更高的价格向狼买地，并转嫁到兔窝价格上，再加价后卖给兔子。


看到狼辛苦地为自己操劳，兔子很感谢狼，但还是发现兔窝价格越来越贵。


狼说：这事挺复杂，还真不太好办，不过兔子们放心，我们将继续调控，可以向已经有兔窝的兔子征收兔窝税┉


看见的转发一下，因为有些兔子还不明白。近日，世界银行高级副行长、首席经济学家林毅夫一针见地指出：“穷人把钱存入银行，实际上是补贴富人”。在中国有一个奇怪的现象：穷人到银行存款，富人到银行贷款。结果穷人越来越穷，富人越来越富！中国的老百姓只要坚持3个月之内不存钱，房价将跌穿，银行破产。中国的很多问题就可迎刃而解 。群多的转发吧，有多少转发多少，总有一天物价会降,这个信息够狠的。因为我们大部分是兔子。。。

New roaster recipe

Facebook Emoticons!

1. [[298040873618149]] 10 .[[297661603656076]] 19 .[[298042586951311]]
2. [[298040923618144]] 11 .[[298040973618139]] 20 .[[298041200284783]]
3. [[298040850284818]] 12 .[[297701020318801]] 21 .[[298042953617941]]
4. [[297701146985455]] 13 .[[297701346985435]] 22 .[[298210456934524]]
5. [[297701246985445]] 14 .[[297700903652146]] 23 .[[297701743652062]]
6. [[297701400318763]] 15 .[[297701503652086]] 24 .[[298041003618136]]
7. [[297700676985502]] 16 .[[298210386934531]] 25 .[[298042773617959]]
8. [[297700806985489]] 17 .[[298210533601183]] 26 .[[298041500284753]]
9. [[297666056988964]] 18 .[[298240153598221]] 27 .[[298041810284722]]

For those who don't understand the Emoticon " =.=" or "-.-"

中文的奥秘

Malaysian's English - ways of saying 'can'

Sexual Calorie Counter

Sex is used to climb the corporate ladder - Confession from a corporate lady

 
photo from


When her ability failed to clinch deals, this business graduate used her sex appeal, and slept with people in power to get promotions.


Now an MNC vice-president, she says brains and hard work are not enough


Get real. Sex to help push sales or seal contracts happens.


The reason is simple, says this vice-president of a multi-national corporation: It is easier to secure a contract with people who find you physically attractive.


Nora, who spoke on condition of anonymity, is in her early 40s, but looks barely 30.


At 1.67m tall and with vital stats of 36-26-36, she is also pretty and witty.


Her eyes are seductive and she carries herself with confidence.


Nora says: "It comes with the years (of practice and experience). Now, I don't even have to fake being sexy."


She is blunt and is likely to be one of a few with such liberal and mercenary views on sex and climbing up the corporate ladder.


Three women are under siege after being implicated in a sex-for-contracts case with former Singapore Civil Defence Force chief Peter Lim Sin Pang, who was charged in court on Wednesday on 10 counts of corruption.


Referring to the way she looks, Nora says: "You know what? People listen. And they buy whatever I'm selling. Whether it's a product or a concept, or even an idea."


Nora, who owns a supercar and a luxury car, adds: "Seriously, show me an ugly, successful sales executive and I'd line up 20 gorgeous and more successful women just with a snap of a finger.

"And before your readers whack me, they should ask themselves, how often have they seen a cute guy or girl and gone, 'Okay, what he or she is selling, I'm buying'."


She was not always so cynical or liberal.


Nora claims that when she started out as a marketing executive in an advertising firm at 20, she was "all young, innocent and stupid".


The business administration graduate says: "I'd dress up in three-piece suits and fully cover my body when I went for sales pitches.


"I thought that if I used my brains to sell, it would impress potential clients."


But Nora gradually concluded that "it was never going to be the case", considering that most decision-makers are men.


She flips through an album that shows photos of her from the past.


"See this prim and proper image? I still remember what my boss told me during our pep talk," she says.


It was her third month - "almost near the end of my probation period" - when she had secured "only a miserable two out of 60 sales pitches".


"He asked if I had really looked at myself in the mirror each morning.


"He also asked if I knew why he hired me in the first place."


And this was a boss that everyone described as "the perfect gentleman, the ideal husband and a wonderful dad".


Says Nora: "Here's a decent family man, who's looking at me with less than decent interest and telling me, 'I didn't hire you to be my children's matronly nanny. I hired you because you have this sexual allure.'


"My jaw dropped. I wasn't even sure if I'd heard him correctly until he ended the talk with, 'To put it bluntly, I'd like to get in bed with you, if you're willing. Or if you're not, then go work your charms on the right men or you can just quit'."



Four months after she first had sex with her marketing director in exchange for a premium clientele list, Nora was promoted to head of her team.


A year later, she was offered the position of senior associate.


Doesn't that make her more like a prostitute?


Wouldn't there be more pride working your way up using your own talents?


Nora says cynically: "Sure, we can reject the indecent proposals and walk away, but think about it, if all it takes is just that one move... Why act all chaste and innocent?"


Still, Nora turned down the offer of senior associate and moved on to a car company to become its regional deputy vice-president of sales.


She says: "I left the first firm with my director's blessings and I knew it was also because he had his eyes set on another newbie."


Nora admits that she has no qualms about using her looks, her smile or even her body to advance her career.


"Come on, don't tell me that I can get to the top with just sheer hard work," she maintains.


"Of course I don't go to every sales appointment dressed like a prostitute with a come-hither look. I do my homework, find out more about the potential client and decide on what works best."


She adds: "Sex is a convenient tool of exchange. I'd use it when necessary. Not everyone is into sex. For such clients, I showcase my natural talent - intelligence and wit."


Nora quickly adds, as if to underscore her intelligence: "By the way, I've acquired two postgraduate degrees, one in economics and the other in business."


It is also not a big deal whether the client is married or even if the client is a woman.

Nora claims: "I had a brief fling with a lesbian client and she took me to my position here today."

She declines to elaborate, but would only say that she and that client are now good friends.


"Not in the sexual sense though," she adds.


Nora, who is dating "someone out of the sales line", does not discuss work with her boyfriend.


Doesn't she feel guilty being so flippant about sex?


What about being faithful to him?


"I don't care if he knows. At most, he'd walk out of the relationship. It would not be the end of the world," she says.


"I have my job. I am cash-rich and debt-free. I own three properties and, well, I can go anywhere I want without being dependent on anyone, much less a man."


Original Article from http://www.tnp.sg/

Facebook chat trick - Doremon

Just put the following into the FB chat. the doremon cartoon will appear.


1 .
[[317704281660278]] [[317704291660277]] [[317704294993610]] [[317704288326944]]
[[317704284993611]] [[317704391660267]] [[317704411660265]] [[317704404993599]]
[[317704401660266]] [[317704408326932]] [[317704524993587]] [[317704521660254]]
[[317704531660253]] [[317704518326921]] [[317704528326920]] [[317704641660242]]
[[317704638326909]] [[317704651660241]] [[317704648326908]] [[317704644993575]]
[[317704778326895]] [[317704774993562]] [[317704781660228]] [[317704784993561]]


2 .
[[269373136513810]] [[269373083180482]] [[269373076513816]] [[269373133180477]]
[[269373079847149]] [[269373226513801]] [[269373183180472]] [[269373186513805]]
[[269373223180468]] [[269373199847137]] [[269373366513787]] [[269373346513789]]
[[269373289847128]] [[269373343180456]] [[269373369847120]] [[269373513180439]]
[[269373576513766]] [[269373509847106]] [[269373599847097]] [[269373589847098]]
[[269373899847067]] [[269373833180407]] [[269373893180401]] [[269373896513734]]


3 .
[[340726846021411]] [[340726856021410]] [[340726849354744]] [[340726859354743]]
[[340726842688078]] [[340726966021399]] [[340726962688066]] [[340726969354732]]
[[340726959354733]] [[340726972688065]] [[340727076021388]] [[340727062688056]]
[[340727072688055]] [[340727069354722]] [[340727059354723]] [[340727189354710]]
[[340727192688043]] [[340727196021376]] [[340727182688044]] [[340727186021377]]
[[340727309354698]] [[340727302688032]] [[340727306021365]] [[340727312688031]]


4 .
[[340728182687944]] [[340728196021276]] [[340728199354609]] [[340728192687943]] [[340728189354610]]
[[340728309354598]] [[340728312687931]] [[340728316021264]] [[340728319354597]] [[340728322687930]]
[[340728416021254]] [[340728422687920]] [[340728419354587]] [[340728412687921]] [[340728426021253]]
[[340728526021243]] [[340728536021242]] [[340728532687909]] [[340728529354576]] [[340728539354575]]
[[340728669354562]] [[340728662687896]] [[340728672687895]] [[340728676021228]] [[340728666021229]]
[[340728782687884]] [[340728779354551]] [[340728776021218]] [[340728786021217]] [[340728789354550]]


5 .
[[475202742504301]] [[475202749170967]] [[475202739170968]] [[475202752504300]] [[475202745837634]]
[[475202855837623]] [[475202862504289]] [[475202869170955]] [[475202859170956]] [[475202865837622]]
[[475202969170945]] [[475202972504278]] [[475202965837612]] [[475202959170946]] [[475202962504279]]
[[475203085837600]] [[475203079170934]] [[475203092504266]] [[475203089170933]] [[475203082504267]]
[[475203212504254]] [[475203202504255]] [[475203205837588]] [[475203215837587]] [[475203209170921]]
[[475203312504244]] [[475203305837578]] [[475203319170910]] [[475203315837577]] [[475203309170911]]


6 .
[[363614923714371]] [[363614920381038]] [[363614910381039]] [[363614917047705]] [[363614913714372]]
[[363615027047694]] [[363615020381028]] [[363615033714360]] [[363615037047693]] [[363615030381027]]
[[363615140381016]] [[363615147047682]] [[363615143714349]] [[363615153714348]] [[363615150381015]]
[[363615250381005]] [[363615257047671]] [[363615253714338]] [[363615260381004]] [[363615263714337]]
[[363615367047660]] [[363615377047659]] [[363615373714326]] [[363615370380993]] [[363615363714327]]
[[363615480380982]] [[363615473714316]] [[363615477047649]] [[363615470380983]] [[363615467047650]]
[[363615587047638]] [[363615583714305]] [[363615580380972]] [[363615577047639]] [[363615590380971]]  

I DO Believe 我相信 ( 要改变，投 火箭 ) 大选歌曲